Ahh, it's almost TAX DAY, Americans (April 15th). I've gone through my past blog posts to find the funniest status updates about this hideous time of year in which we fill out forms we know nothing about and hope get money and stuff back from the government. Enjoy!
____ is looking for friends with tax benefits. (Lisa James)
____ would have gotten a lot more back on my taxes if I could claim co-dependents. (MY STATUS IS BADDEST)
____ I got BOMBED tonight and decided to do my own taxes and guess what! I'm getting 4 million dollars back this year! (Bob MuppetMan Brittain)
____ Turbo Tax might just be the worst video game I've ever played (Justin Sayson)
____ gets euphoric when I get my tax refund until I realize it was my money to begin with. (MY STATUS IS BADDEST)
____ Just did my taxes, guess what? I owe the government 1 kidney, my first born child and 3 million dollars. I hate these new tax laws. (Gwen Masterson)
____ has been declared "legally dead" for tax purposes. (Scott Brady)
____ "When it comes to taxes, there are two types of people. There are those that get it done early, also known as psychopaths, and then the rest of us." –Jimmy Kimmel
____ It bothers me when I see tax money wasted on signs telling deer where to cross the road. (Mhalou Diaz-Consengco)
____ "A dollar saved is a quarter earned." -Oscar Levant
____ "Income tax returns are the most imaginative fiction being written today." -Herman Wouk
FYI: I grace my Facebook Fan page with new status updates daily. Click HERE to become a Fan on Facebook! I will publish those that my twisted mind enjoys.