____ is eating Easter Candy. I wonder how quickly I can convert it into fat cells?
____ doesn't get what the big deal is. I've cleaned every spring in this house in less than a half hour and I haven't even broken a sweat.
Big words (they make you seem smarter):
____ likes umlauts a löt. (Jason Sweeney)
____ likes talking to myself. I bring up some really good points.
____ thinks the easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
____ thinks the internet has allowed me to be disappointed in many people, some of whom I have never even met.
____ The first rule of Fight Club is DO NOT CREATE FACEBOOK FAN PAGES ABOUT FIGHT CLUB.