Facebook status updates about work:
____ Based on my current rate of income, I estimate that I could retire comfortably about 143 years after my death.
____ What does it mean to be productive? I will think about this question while sitting in my new, awesome manila folder igloo at work.
____ snuck a bunch of booze into work today using my stomach. (TIP: Don't use this one if your boss is your Facebook friend)
Facebook status update about Facebook:
____ gets disappointed every time I'm in the bank and it doesn't get robbed because I'd love to talk about that in my Facebook Status update.
Wanna sound smart?
____ Studies show it's okay for me to just say "studies show" in front of whatever I want to say and that makes it true. (from my FB FAN PAGE)
____ hates when people say "when all is said and done" when, in reality, they never stop saying things and doing stuff. (from my FB FAN PAGE)
____ thinks that anybody can make a mistake. It takes real dedication to make all of them.