____ Whenever I Google something, I get so distracted by the absurd things others have Googled that I rarely get my answer. (from my FB Fan Page)
____ thinks that procrastination is exhausting.
Facebook Status update about Mondays:
____ Today is Monday, and that's reason enough for me to hate it. (from my FB Fan Page)
Facebook Status update about Facebook:
____ This Facebook Status update has absolutely no nutritional value.
____ would drink more water if it were packed with barley, hops and grains.
____ If you're going to walk a mile in my shoes, can you pick me up some booze on your way back? (from my FB Fan Page)
____ People who can't find happiness aren't in a liquor store. (from my FB Fan Page)
____ always contradicts myself. No I don't. (from my FB Fan Page)
____ feels like nobody is ever *really* listening until I make a mistake.
____ The only thing I've learned from my mistakes is that I make a whole bunch of them.
____ has my own way of doing things...generally clumsy and usually late. (from my FB Fan Page)
____ Everybody get your flu shots now! Make sure all of your family and friends do too. Then I won't have to get one.
FYI: I grace my Facebook Fan page with a new update daily. Click HERE to become a Fan on Facebook! Want to share a funny, clever or witty Facebook status update? Do you have a funny one-liner you'd like to share? Send me an email at email@example.com.