____ had social networking when I was a kid, too. I think back then it was called "outside." (from my FACEBOOK PAGE)
____ feels bad for the month of January. As soon as I touched it, it was ruined.
____ You know you're getting old when people start telling you how young you look.
Money (or lack thereof):
____ needs to have a fixed income. Mine is broken.
____ When I see people outside, smoking in freezing temperatures, it makes me wonder what else I can get them to do. (from my FACEBOOK PAGE)
____ doesn't accept blame well, but it's not my fault.
____ time flies when you're having beer.
____ If I ever find out who keeps shrinking my pants, I'm going to strangle them. Then I'm going to steal all of their candy.
FYI: I grace my Facebook Fan page with a new update daily. Click HERE to become a Fan on Facebook! Do you know a funny, clever or witty Facebook status update? Do you have a funny one-liner you'd like to share? Send me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org.