Thanks to everyone who contributes to my Facebook FAN PAGE!
____ The way to make money on Facebook is to go into settings, delete your account, and get back to work. (Jad Bou Karam)
____ If the eyes are the window to our soul...I better pluck mine out. (Nobo Dy)
____ Lazy Rule #19: If you drop the ice cube, just kick it under the fridge. (Rajat Joshi)
____ The best part about having a friend in a different time zone is getting to hear first hand what the future is like. (SamGirl Sunday)
____ Alcohol removes your ability to dance, speak and choose who you go home with. But none of that matters because it also removes your memory. (Nicole Romeo-Bonales)
____ Optimists lack a lot of imagination. (Hannah Froncek)
____ If you give your kids a bath and don't give them "troll hair" while shampooing, then I dunno...you're probably a boring person. (Nobo Dy)
____ No one is as ugly as their drivers license picture, or as good-looking as their Facebook profile picture. (Hassan Fayyaz)
____ No, Google. Don’t tell me what you think I mean. What I typed is what I meant! Know it all! (Gathoni Awesam Gath)
____ Alcohol is NOT the answer but it does make you forget the question. (Jack Levy)
____ Sometimes I like to put bubble-wrap under my mattress so when I have sex, it sounds like fireworks are going off. Just makes for a more festive mood. (William Hale)
____ No, I totally understand, hot woman sitting by yourself at the bar. You spent 3 hours getting ready to drink alone tonight. I get it. (Jason Sellers)
____ Think of a number between 1 and 10. Multiply by 5. Divide by 2. Close your eyes.. Dark isn't it? (Jad Bou Karam)
____ Who remembers when downloading a song was trying to tape it off the radio and hoping the Dj didnt talk over the phone? (Steven Kim)
____ Of all the great books in the world, of all the masterful literary achievements around the globe, the brilliant writers, the insightful memoirs...you've chosen to read this ridiculous status update and have learned absolutely nothing. (Jacob Grant)
____ The squiggly red lines in Word documents are your computer's allergic reaction to dumb. (Jason Sellers)
____ When I die, I hope I'm not reincarnated as a shower drain. (Nobo Dy)
