____ FYI: Taking permanent marker and writting Aeropostale on Fruit of the Loom tee shirts will NOT fool your teenager. (Donny Norris)
____ Quick question. When filling out a resume, is "facebook friends" capitalized? (Justin John Bernard)
____I hate all of these people...*tap* *tap* oh...this thing is on? Uh... HI... love you all! (Mustache Mann)
____ likes my house like I like myself. Dark and empty. (Nobo Dy)
____ Pain is nature's way of saying "Don't do that." - Painkillers are mankind's way of saying "Screw it ... go ahead." (Chris Hallman)
____ has a fetish fetish. Things that turn me on, turn me on. (Jen Miller)
____ When anyone ask me to babysit, I ask if their kid is a "mean drunk" or a "happy drunk." Gets me out of it every time. (OverDose)
____ So it turns out you ARE a loser. . . .I Googled it. (Jenni More)
____ ☐ Single. ☐ Taken. ☑ Helping Mario get Peach back (Gagan Adiwal)
____ Whenever I order salami from the deli.. I make sure I emphasize "THICK" when they ask me how I want it sliced. (Toni Daniels)
____ There's something fishy about this cucumber I'm eating... (Mustache Mann)
____ There is nothing quite like the pang of disappointment you feel when you realize that you have pressed the wrong button on the vending machine as you stare at that damn granola bar instead of a hunny bun. (Donny Norris)
____ "I f**kin' hate cats." ~Curiosity (Justin John Bernard)
____ Ya know. This whole time I thought they were using reverse psychology on me, so I say yes to drugs. (Nobo Dy)
____ Wow! Just realized that my birthday is only four days away...and you know what that means? No one gives a sh*t because I am an adult. (Rae Broman)
____ Just once, wants to hear Bob The Builder say "Can we build it?! No, were f***ed!!" (Daisy Varnell)
____ Received a wrong number call at 6am. I now have them on speed dial to drunk dial at 2 am. (Rae Broman)
____ knows what you did last summer..... Heck, I know what you're doing right now. Turn around and wave~ Me (Mustache Mann)
____ If you're upset, depressed, lost, and think everyone hates you. You're probably right! (Nobo Dy)
____ HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, I could've been a doctor by now. (Nobo Dy)
____ had a great workout with my personal trainer this morning and by personal trainer I mean the bum who chased me during my morning jog begging for money. (Donny Norris)
(¯` * •. ¸ ♥ ♥ ¸. • * '¯) ♥ (¯ `* •. ¸ ♥ (¯`* •. ¸ ♥ ♥ ¸. • * '¯)
♥-I put this here because its stupid and you like stupid stuff-♥
(¯` * •. ¸ ♥ ♥ ¸. • * '¯) ♥ (¯ `* •. ¸ ♥ (¯` * •. ¸ ♥ ♥ ¸ • * ' (Lisa James)
____ If your dog is barking at the back door and your husband is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in. (Toni Daniels)
____ Everyone else sees STOP... I see STOPtional. (Toni Daniels)
____ Brokeback Mountain pretty much ruined camping as a male bonding activity for straight guys. (Rae Broman)
____ Everyday, I get a sense of accomplishment, knowing that I proved all those people wrong that keep saying "you can't keep living like this!" HA! :p (Mustache Mann)
____ They say that spontaneity is the spice of life but I don't see it on the shelf so I'm going with Paprika. (Donny Norris)
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