Wednesday, November 23, 2011


Some of these are old, some of these are new... Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

____ Thanksgiving: That magical time of year when we give thanks that the people we no longer want to be around are no longer around us.
____ This Thanksgiving, here's to the tryptophan kicking in before somebody mentions politics and religion!
____ is it just me, or does this gravy I made taste like scotch? Anyway, best Thanksgiving EVER!
____ Thanksgiving dinners take 18 hours to prepare. They are consumed in 12 minutes. In football, half-time takes 12 minutes. This is not coincidence.
____ is thankful for friends that will inform me of what a good time I had the night before Thanksgiving.
____ Happy Thanksgiving! May all of the turkeys you encounter be on the table.
____ thanks for making me not feel bad, even when I probably should.
____ just told my family that during Thanksgiving dinner this year they're only allowed to communicate with me via Facebook Status updates. I don't think they are pleased. :( (From my FAN PAGE)
____ is thankful that wrinkles don't hurt.
____ Today's Thanksgiving craft: Building a tiny box in my soul to silently scream into during the family gatherings tomorrow. (TIM SIEDELL)
____ This year, we're having a stress-free Thanksgiving dinner. I'm stuffing the turkey with Prozac.
____ Thanksgiving's the sexy holiday, right? No? Am I allowed to make it sexy?
____ Thanksgiving is a time to give thanks, even to horribly selfish people who never do it for you.

And a few from my FAN PAGE:

____ If you've never seen a guest pretend to give someone a turkey baster enema before, apparently you've never invited me over for Thanksgiving before. (Jack Olivar)
____ Because it's the season to give thanks, I would just like to're welcome. (Bob Brittain)
____ "Ooo Ooo... you know what I'm super excited about? THE THANKSGIVING DAY PARADE!!!!" ~Lame people (Donny Norris)
____ ‎"Only one more day before I'll be elbow deep inside a dead animal's carcass" ~ Thanksgiving stuffing (Jack Olivar)
____ This Thanksgiving, I'm thankful that we don't celebrate Thanksgiving here. (Danny Coleiro)
____ "Have an EPIC THANKSGIVING!" - me last year when "epic" was cool. (Tim Beavin)
____ What am I taking to the Family Thanksgiving feast? Tupperware. (Rich Stevenson)
____ I'm really good at using the turkey baster as a sword and getting drunk and not being invited to Thanksgiving anymore. (Jack Olivar)