Tuesday, January 24, 2012


I love my readers. I really do. There's no joke here. I haven't posted fan status updates in a long time and now I'm about 50,000 status updates behind. Whether you contribute status updates to my FAN PAGE or you simply enjoy reading them (and stealing a few, because this stuff is hilarious), I thank you.

____ Paula Deen has no one to blame butter self. (William Hale)
____ a drunk man walks into a bar.... Ok enough about me (Adam Apple)
____ "WE WANT CHANGE!...WE WANT CHANGE!...I DRIVE A VOLKSWAGON!" - a protester with ADD (Bob Brittain)
____ Why do they have a beauty section at Walmart? (SamGirl Sunday)
____ Does anybody know the name of that middle eastern country on the Arabic peninsula? Yemen either. (Donny Norris)
____ If I was Leonardo DiCaprio's friend and he did somethin' stupid.. I'd call him "Leotard" then we'd laugh and make out a lil' bit. (Toni Daniels)
____ If I was Superman that would be funny, cuz I'm kinda fat. (Bob Brittain)
____ Have you ever looked at someone and thought, "Yep, you have a person in your basement."? (Carrie Leigh)
____ so Jon Bon Jovi is doing advil commercials now? He must be livin on a prayer that he won't go bankrupt. (Lisa James)
____ I had this awesome dream last night where Facebook went down and most of you went on a killing spree. (Nobo Dy)
____ Look a$$holes, for the most part I just stay in the corner and mind my own damn business, no need to freak out and stuff.~ Spiders (Donny Norris)
____ Why don't we take this relationship to the next level and you loan me some money. (Egg Head)
____ Sometimes I write "This is a hold up. I have a gun." in the memo of the cheques I write for people and pray they cash them at the teller. (SamGirl Sunday)
____ "THIS IS BULLSH*T!!!" - Me, in a cow pasture (Bob Brittain)
____ In a perfect world, R. Kelly would get stung by a jellyfish and then pissed on by all his underage fans. (Nobo Dy)
____ The Dr. didn't seem to find it as humorous as I did, that I drew penises on the ends of all his tongue depressors... (Mustache Mann)
____ "I solemnly swear that I will never drink this much again as long as I live." - Me, in 1997. And '98, '99, pretty much all of the noughties, last year. And tomorrow. (Danny Coleiro)
____ Sometimes I worry that my online life may be pushing the people in my real life away. My friend just told me she broke her leg & I said LOL instead of laughing for real. (SamGirl Sunday)
____ If my life had a soundtrack it would just be a mixture of me snoring and white noise from the TV...(Donny Norris)
____ The toughest decision you should make today is bottle, draft, or can. (Nobo Dy)

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Did you know your CELL PHONE has a name?

I posted this yesterday on my FAN PAGE and had over 700 comments!

Did you know your CELL PHONE has a name? Try this:
1st step: from your mobile number number, take the last 3 numbers. Example- 780-496-9684 , take "684"only
2nd step: Write this @*[684:0] in the comment box below, replacing the 3 numbers with your own.
3rd step: remove the * sign and press enter in the comment box.

Your Facebook friends will be astounded and amazed! They'll marvel at your knowledge! Or something like that.

Here's a Funny picture to post, at no extra charge: