____ Is it wrong to hate a certain RACE? I like 5k races but my team is starting 10k races which I don't like very much. (Basti Agustin)
____ There's a bloodmobile in town and I'll be going down tonight to donate a pint. They have some new guy in charge? His name is Dr. Acula or something like that. (Cary Conrad)
____ There is always that one person in gym class who thinks they're in the Olympics. (Farhanah Khalit)
____ One day, we will all live in the future. (Teresa Whitaker)
____ my wallet is like an onion, everytime i open it-- I cry. (Pamela Nichole DiGruccio)
____ I've noticed the drunker us women get, the more we want to sing song hits from the 80's (Shannon Seymour)
____ "I don't even have a glass." - a true pessimist. (Danny Coleiro)
____ If you try to tell me why your candidate is the best, I switch parties regardless who you like just because I like to argue sometimes. (Beau Diggity)
____ Went to a fancy dress party as Humpty Dumpty last night. Got smashed. (Hollywood Allan)
____ Hates the terrifying moment when your cat or dog walks into the room, stares at something you can't see, and then runs away in a panic :/ (Gary Hensley)
____ I've been informed that Facebook plans to ban naughty language and near nude or rude photos in the near future. So as a test, ****, *****, Mother *****, Eat **** and Die! (Justin John Bernard)
____ Dora has taught me just enough Spanish, to engage Spanish-speaking people in the worst conversation they've ever had. (Tanya De Vito McMahon)
____ Since starting my new 'hot cake' business, I have come to the conclusion that the expression "selling like hot cakes" doesn't mean what I thought it did. (Danny Coleiro)
____ Leaving the house would be so much cooler if someone would yell "Aaaaand Action!" as I walk out the door. (Cedric Stanley)
____ Am I the only one who has a ghost whispering in their ear that it's time to start drinking? (Jack Olivar)
____ I hate it when you use words that even Google can't find. (GoldRobo Dancer Guy)
____ I think we all have that same look on our face when the neighbor catches us peeing in their backyard. (Cary Conrad)
____ Sometimes I shave one of my legs so that when i go to bed it feels like im sleeping next to a woman. (Clint Dempsey)
____ Have you ever womdered if Dora is smuggling drugs in her backpack? (Eddie Olsen)
____ The wife said I dont agree with anything she says. I find that hard to believe. (Hollywood Allan)
____ I just saw a group of Nuns trying to figure out a parking meter, I know there's a joke in there somewhere but I'll have to get back to you. (Glenn Jamin)
____ When someone on my friend list pisses me off, I like to delete the hell out of them, and then request them as a friend again, send them a message saying: "I'm sorry, I have no idea how you got deleted." When they accept again, I delete the hell out of them again and send them a message saying; "bahahaha bahahaha!" That's the way I roll. (Dow Jones)
____ Damn, I'm hungry. Anybody have some spare bacon? I'll pay you on Tuesday for some bacon today. (Henry Andelmo)
____ I hate it when people use this space to talk about how they hate something. Like this post. This is exactly what I'm talking about! (GoldRobo Dancer Guy)
____ My only real goal in life is to fart loud enough to trigger a car alarm. (Clint Dempsey)
____ Damn, got up too late to go the gym again. That makes 12 years in a row now. (Dave NoMoneyhoney Blum)
____ Sad Mustache Mann :-{( (Manish Bhardwaj)
____ Park and ride sucks, waddaya mean no beer on the bus? (Beau Diggity)
____ Sure...I'd be happy to not like that. (Nawknee Kuuipo K)
____ I like to log into Facebook and leave a status just to show I'm here. Or am I? (Juliet Rockspin)
