____ If you like Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain then you should move to Puerto Rico cause that's were the drink was invented and it rains like seven months out of the year over there and also I will never have to hear you sing that stupid song again. (Donny Norris)
____ Drinking promotes freedom of speech. Call me tonight and I'll tell what I really think of you! (Carrie Leigh)
____ "I Love My Wife" bumper stickers are strictly for men who were caught cheating. (William Hale)
____ If one more person makes a crappy joke about poop I'm dung with them! (Juliet Rockspin)
____ M C SQUARE is Einstein's Rap Name. (Adam Apple)
____ I never cease to be amazed by the levels of awesomeness I achieve on a daily basis. (Bob MuppetMan Brittain)
____ There should be a warning label on Captain Crunch which reads: "WARNING: Will probably f*** the roof of your mouth up." (Dave Hetterly IV)
____ Eating a bowl of generic frosted flakes... THEY'RRRRRRRRRE alright, I guess (Mike Seriously)
____ I don't like thinking before I say something. I like to be just as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth. (Mikel Khalil)
____ That awkward moment when you post a funny status and there's that one person who ruins it by saying something serious. (Jason Fundora)
____ "You won’t like me when I’m angry. Becase I always back up my rage with facts and documented sources." – The Credible Hulk (William Hale)
____ The cop asked me for my papers. I gave him my Zig-Zags. I think he prefers Jokers. :{ (Mustache Mann)
____ I have lost my mojo. If anyone finds it, let me know. It's wearing lipgloss, fishnets and smells like JLO perfume. (Susan Evon Cross)
____ When people ask me Plz because it's shorter than please, I tell them no because it's shorter than yes. (Shannon Seymour)